New Facebook reactions: totally offended?

As anybody on Facebook will have noticed: Facebook finally lauched their new reactions. We already had the Like-button. Half the world wanted a dislike button. But now we have five new like-options, called ‘reactions’ by Facebook.

We have Like, Love, Haha, Wow, Sad and Angry. We can now express our emotions better. Better than just a like. So Facebook can do some number crunching and show you even more appropriate ads tailored to your interests.

No Dislike reaction yet unfortunately. And of course, just those reactions are not enough. That is why The Oatmeal created a bunch really great additional reactions.
Facebook reactions - with 'totally offended'
Meneer D is already using the reactions in a dysfunctional way. You know, responding ‘Sad‘ to a graduation post, ‘liking’ with ‘Angry‘ when someone just shared a funny post Meneer D shared. Not really trolling, but just confusing people.

However, Meneer D felt that a serious contender for the reactions was missing. You should be able to derail every post and conversation on Facebook. Make things totally awkward. Make a statement. And be dysfunctional by mimicking orthodox bigots who justify being a bigot by saying something offends them (think Westboro Baptist Church).

Thus. The new reaction: ‘I’m totally offended by this‘.
Facebook reactions: I'm totally offended by this
Should work. Should make things awkward. Close to trolling.

‘Look a sweet kitten sleeping’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

‘I cooked spaghetti with brownies for dinner! Here are 12 pics’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

‘Thanks for all the birthday messages.’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

‘Article link: ice discovered on the 23rd moon of Pluto’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

‘I’m watching Little House On The Prairie’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

‘I really like this new Kanye West album, it is so everything is awesome!’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’
-‘I’m totally offended by this’

Let’s hope Facebook will add ‘I’m totally offended by this‘ even before they implement the dislike-button.

What do you think? Totally offended by all of this?

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Auteur: Meneer D

Meneer D is een taalpurist en woordengoochelaar.

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